Exclusive leaked footage of Brexit talks

Exclusive footage of the Brexit negotiations leaked. Boris Johnson and his counterparts are making ‘fast progress’ as this video reveals. The leading Rebel Without a Clue, Dominic Grieve, had no comment this morning.

With the two sides at loggerheads, even Westminster was in complete disagreement.  Boris Johnson emphasised that he wants to reach a deal on a withdrawal agreement, while President Micron of France insisted that there must be a deal.  In Parliament, Dominic Grievous and Sam Verbal-Gymnast refused to back their own government, demanding “We want a deal”.  Philip Hammond in the meantime flew to Brussels with his unique message that he wants to see a deal made.

The sides are as far apart as ever.

Ulster dominated the early talks: London insists that there will be no hard border with the Irish Free State, while Brussels countered angrily that there must be no hard border between the British and Irish states.  Memos from the Wilhelmstraße intercepted by GCHQ express demand that no Starkgrenze be erected at the edge of the European Empire’s Hibernian Province.

With no agreement in sight on these points, agreement by Reformation Day looks distant.

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Author: faykinuise

Superheroine reporter, legend in her own bathtime, who never lets a lack of facts get in the way of a breaking story